Thursday, November 30, 2006

Defective bogey at Earlsfield*

One does so try to avoid tedious Commuters' Tales. I would not normally mention the 2.5 hours it took to get from Kings Cross Thameslink to Lovely Luton last night but for this: it seems routine that some group of people somewhere around the capital is having their journey fucked up for them nearly every day.
I had plenty of time yesterday while stationary "in the Harpenden area" to wonder if London travellers are uniquely unfortunate or if other large conurbations worldwide suffer these endemic "points failures" and "signal faults", such that the evening paper has the word "chaos" poised in large type ready to go next to "tube" or "travel" for every edition.
Indeed, what would our own dear Evening Standard DO if "chaos" was removed from the language?
*"Morning Joan: 11 minutes late - badger hit a junction box at New Malden."

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Smokers' Corner

Catching in my delicate nostrils the raucous pungency of Someone Else's Smoke today made me appreciate how far we've come. Boggins snuffed his last fag* over 6 years ago. At that time smoking was a minority pursuit, frowned upon by the worthy and healthy, but we smokers were still a big minority. The smoke-filled room was still available, and plenty of us congregated outside or on the stairs to feed our dirty habit. Now, from what I can see, it's nearly extinct. You see someone smoking, it's an oddity. The forthcoming ban is hardly going to be an issue for most, and yet a decade ago it was a loony California "pipedream" (hurhur).
Once upon a time I had an ashtray by my bed. Unbelievable.

* note to Americans: I have never knowingly murdered a homosexual.

Monday, November 27, 2006

More TV trivia

You saw Mrs Massup* and the mutt on Dog Borstal. The camera crew "forgot" to put in batteries at the crucial time, and Boggins' dull interjections were never saved. Your loss. Write to the DG.

*no chaffinch she.

Old Lily post

Family Entertainment

After a pause or hiatus of about 18 months we've got digital/ satellite TV again. It makes me so happy that we can finally return to some proper TV programming, such as Sky's "Cirque de Celebrité" .
Celebrities? Fat bloke who used to be in Grange Hill. A couple of women who look like former porn actresses. The others? Giggling leftovers barely recognised beyond their own bathroom mirrors.
We're looking through the keyhole of the door to hell. Hear the shrieking and screaming of the damned. See the posturing and gurning of the self-deluded and desperate.
Turn back to Fairly Odd Parents.
Ms Wax, who used to have a career, appears by courtesy of Hieronymus Bosch and/or Max Clifford.